Church Ramblings

Returning to my first post and the list of things I'd been thinking about, first one being "Church. Why?"

For many years I had no church involvement at all, and do not remember even thinking about God, spirituality, etc., etc.

Returning to church in my early thirties, I felt a great sense of relief and thankfulness that I could be with others thinking about the "big questions." It was the right place at the right time for me.

My most recent church connectedness, for the last 13 plus years at a church in Minneapolis, is now completed, as I have moved to Washington State. I was way over-involved there and it had become a duty and a chore to attend meetings. I had very little feeling of spirituality, although I did love and do miss the community of the church.

Now I feel no pull to go to church. The question is "why?" I do feel there is something missing, but I don't feel that I will connect with it at church or in worship.

HOWEVER! A thought has been repeating itself inside my head, "just show up." So I can see I am toying with something that is almost like an idea and possibly might turn into a want...to be in a worship experience and see where I go with it.

Like so much in my life, I know more about what I don't want/like/feel good about, than about what I really DO WANT.

And now I have reached the rambling section of my thoughts, so will stop.